Guest post by Big Safes Buddy
Given it’s FA CUP weekend, and we are not involved, I thought I’d cobble together a guest article
It was on our pre-season trip to Germany that HH introduced Russ and I to EbiWhu. We didn’t know at the time but we had spotted him ourselves earlier when West Ham were playing Werder Bremen at a remote outpost called Schneverdingen. When we drove into this lovely little town on our way to meet up with H, we spotted a retro Hammer’s tracksuit top and beenie hat bowling down the road on his lonesome.“Blimey Russ, I said, “Has H been on a diet?” (Alright I made that bit up.) Later on, at the game, H made the introductions and afterwards, over a bit of grub and a few beers, whilst all things Hammers and football were being discussed, we mentioned how we’d like to go to a Bundesliga game some time – and Dortmund in particular.
Ebi told us how difficult it was to get tickets and it involved a ballot, but he’d see what he could do. To our delight we got a call early in the new year to tell us we’d been lucky and that he had managed to get hold of a couple of tickets and plans were put in place for the FA Cup weekend of 28/29 January. Also, not only were we going to see Dortmund v Freiberg on the Saturday but Leverkusen v Mainz on the Sunday as well. Incidentally, we actually missed out on a treble treat because Cologne were at home on the Friday evening, but I was at her majesty’s pleasure and the bleeper on my electronic tag would’ve caused chaos on Ryanair! Alright, I made that bit up as well, as I was actually on Jury Service, which meant we couldn’t fly out until Saturday morning. What followed was a marvellous 2-day football tourist experience. Our host Ebi was waiting for us at Cologne airport and his car was not hard to spot. See if you can work out why?
There was no time to waste and it was straight into it with a drive over to Dortmund. We arrived really early but so did lots of other people and there was already a decent vibe about. We went into the megastore for a nose around where Ebi very kindly insisted on buying both me and Russ a Dortmund scarf as a souvenir. Now, apart from the Daggers I’ve never been adorned in another club’s colours, but we were guests of Ebi, and his fanatical Dortmund supporting son Thomas, and anything else would’ve been down right disrespectful.
Russ and I were blown away by Dortmund’s ground and especially the world famous Yellow Wall. I saw the Liverpool kop back in the day and I’ve seen the modern version and whilst that is still impressive, this terrace is on another level. And a terrace is exactly what it is; standing only, front to back, rammed full of passionate vocal fans. It’s a huge, but intimate stadium, steep on all 4 sides and we were in the back row on the corner flag but because of the rake we still felt close to the pitch and generally engaged. The noise from the Dortmund fans was superb even though Ebi and his son Tom had told us it was quieter than normal due to various issues around the club
Now I know a lot of football fans over here like a matchday beer but I wouldn’t back ‘em in competition against this lot!! Beer can be taken into your seats over there and boy do they take advantage of it and whilst strictly speaking, smoking isn’t allowed, there was plenty of civil disobedience and blind eyes being turned where that was concerned!! This, allied to the waft of grub and stale beer whirling around the ground and I was back at the Boleyn in the 70’s and 80’s and both me and Russ loved it. Ok, so we could have done without the four chain smokers in the row right in front of us, but it is what it is and without it there wouldn’t have been the authentic aroma that is now sadly missing. You can’t have your cake and eat it or in this case your fag and smoke it! What was also impressive was the sense of real connection for the fans, one example being the buildings set aside to leave their flags and banners etc., etc to save them carting them back and forth. A simple gesture maybe, but significant – and something I can’t see happening at the OS, can you?
The security checks going into the ground were more vigorous than at the OS but you’ll never catch me moaning about that on any level as it’s the times we live in and absolutely necessary. Outside the ground there were numerous cheap, affordable street food stalls and plenty of beer flowing as well. The game ended 2 each which was about right and, if you get a chance, have a look on You Tube for Freiberg’s second goal – truly brilliant! Exiting the ground is pretty much the same as anywhere else with the noticeable exception of the continuous drinking of beer with more than the odd fan worse for wear owing to the sheer volume of the stuff they get through. Policing was also pretty much the same as at most grounds over here as well however but they’ve hit on a good idea to keep order. They hire glamour models and dress them up in police uniforms and in this case even stuck them on horseback
For one minute I thought that Ebi had really pushed the boat out and laid on an elaborate kissogram for us, but sadly not. Sunday morning and following a gourmet brekkie from our kind host it was off to Cologne’s training ground. Only the unused first team squad players from their game that weekend were training but it was still a privilege to be up close and personal to what was an intense session with plenty of quality technique on show. It reminded me of my childhood when we were allowed into Chadwell Heath during school holidays to watch our heroes train. This is another feature that just makes fans feel connected and you have to wonder why we don’t do it over here? As I understand it, it’s common practise in Germany to allow fans into training grounds with the understandable exception of Fridays before a game. I totally understand the fears about social media but, in my opinion, it would be worth the risk. We had a good nose around what really is an impressive set up, the youth teams have their own adjacent pitches and we were lucky enough to see an U14 game going on as well.
From there it was over to Cologne’s stadium. We couldn’t get inside but just had a walk around the circumference. Thanks to our old mucker HH we’d already seen Hamburg and Werder Bremen’s stadiums and it was nice to add another to our list. Next up was Bayer Leverkusen who were at home to Mainz. I was particular looking forward to this as Ebi had spent most of Saturday night telling us how much he didn’t like them, so extra kudos to him for taking us over there through gritted teeth!! He had told us it would be a totally different experience to Dortmund and that their fans were “too nice”. We got what he meant but have to say it was still a great experience in a much smaller but superb stadium. I wanted to ask a Leverkusen fan what he thought of Javier Hernandez and this geezer agreed to answer a few questions provided I bought a bobble hat off him. He didn’t have to bribe me as I was going to buy one anyway as it was freezing and I only had my hammers one on me and I wasn’t going wear that as it just isn’t right is it?
Anyway, he said that he thought Hernandez was a good player and he didn’t want to see him leave. He had heard of West Ham but didn’t know anything about our move to the new stadium or much else really. Our conversation petered out which might have been his poor due to his poor English, but it was more likely down to my poor English! We got into the ground nice and early after what was an even more vigorous frisking down than at Dortmund and the away fans were already in good voice, jumping up and down in their allocated safe standing section over an hour before kick off !! The Bayer fans responded much later on, in much the same way as Palace fans do at Selhurst Park, only bigger and better. All in all it made for a decent atmosphere again and we couldn’t help thinking whilst sat in our seats if only we could have a gaff like this.
OK, so whilst not on the scale of Dortmund, which is without a doubt the best stadium I’ve been in, it was still a very impressive place to watch your football and the fag smoke blind eye was still very much in evidence as was the drinking!! Leverkusen ran out comfortable 2 nil winners and for the second game in a row we were privileged to see a top-class goal!! This time it came from a young Brazilian, or maybe he is Jamaican as we heard later, Bailey, that we are going to hear a lot more about. Two things stood out for me and Russ over the 2 games – the lack of offside’s and 2 excellent referees. Ok, I suspect we might have just got lucky and no doubt they are not all top notch but worthy of a mention anyway.
The trip might only have lasted 2 days but, because we got so much from it, it felt much longer. Safe standing simply has to come in if were ever to get anything like the atmosphere created at Dortmund and we both agreed that it’s a must. To see all those like-minded singers and shouters jumping up and down and singing in unison was a sight to behold. I’ve left out all the fine detail regarding grub and beer as that’s HH’s thing but, trust me, we ate and drank like kings. If anyone ever gets the chance to attend a Dortmund game then you should take it!
I’ve long been thinking that maybe I would become a football tourist and bail out of the premier league circus. This trip has whetted my appetite. I’ll always be West Ham but there’s a big football world out there and my bucket list is calling. Me and my co-pilot Russ have already decided we are doing the Tehran derby next: Rah Ahan FC v. Paykan FC , on our push bikes, (alright that’s another porkie,) but we are doing a Bundesliga drive over as soon as practical and a couple of the other members of IFCF have already thrown their hats into the ring for that. I know I speak for Russ when I say we were both truly humbled by the wonderful hospitality extended to us by Ebi and his family and thanks again mate, for all you done to make it a special couple of days.
PS for anyone who missed it here’s a little giggle we put together with the help of Nigel Kahn .