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Sign Up for the Karren Brady MBA

What are we going to do to maintain our mental health during the football shutdown?

I could suggest we all take up knitting, but I could be accused of sexism, as a lot can be read into that short sentence. The first accusation would be that I am suggesting an activity mainly undertaken by women to a bunch of men and that my actual intention wasn’t to suggest men take up that hobby but to get a cheap laugh at the expense of women.. The second accusation is that I am stating that , during a period of repose, men take up an activity usually undertaken by people who have nothing better to do.

So, I had better steer clear and instead ,suggest you sign up for the new Karren Brady MBA at the Arden University (which I have never heard of). Its an online course and at a cost of £12,000, it’s an absolute snip. Like Karren, it will equip you with the skills to tackle common business issues. You will eventually, like Karren, become a world-class business leader. The blurb states that Kerren gives her fascinating insights into what happens behind the boardroom doors. I do believe a number of people do watch videos of what happens in such situations, so they will be quite fascinated.

Karren has given the site her own view, informing potential students that she has managed and led football clubs. With insight, Karren states that people rarely become an overnight success, but her hard grind (my words not hers) has led her to the top.

Karren came from nothing to her position of greatness. Her father had a mere £50 million quid. Karren didn’t take an MBA herself and, instead, she targeted the advertising spend of one her father’s clients, David Sullivan, who was so impressed by her talents that she end up as managing director of Birmingham City at the tender age of 23. Admittedly, a low point was her arrest on 2006 by the City of London Police amid allegations of corruption in English Football, but it all came to nothing.

As well as having David Sullivan as a mentor, Karren took a job with that other well-known moral example, Phillip Green when in 2017 she took the job of chairman of Taveta who own the Arcadia Group.

I am sure one segment of the MBA will be entitled ‘Chuzapah’, which , on its own will justify the outlay.

Now, to more serious matters and that is the consequence for the Premier League clubs whilst football is at a standstill. At some point, Sky, BT et al will stop paying and that will be a greater blow than the loss of income from the sale of tickets. Wages of £135 million a year will still have to be paid. As it stands, the club has little cash and everything is mortgaged up to the hilt.

The owners will not be able to step in. I suggest you consider the predicament of Intu, a leading property company in retail units and this is effectively bust. The owners of West Ham will be fighting for their survival. One good piece of news for David Gold is that, since people will be spending more time at home, the business of Ann Summers may have revival.

Looking at the results of the stadium survey, this will achieve what the fans want. West Ham will go into administration and rise like a phoenix to a new beginning.

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