West Ham Till I Die
Comments
David Hautzig's Match Report

West Ham 0, Manchester United 2. Shame On The Men In Black.

I hate math. Primarily because I’m awful at it. While at University, I even made an “arrangement” with the professors assistant to get the lowest possible passing grade for the one required math class I needed to graduate.

Worked like a charm.

With Zlatan coming to town today, I thought back to the stories on some websites that linked us with him over the summer. The wages flung around in print were in the posh neighborhood of 300 grand per week. But we were also supposed to be spending 25 million pounds or something like that on a star striker of our own. Zlatan was on a free, right? Let’s say we got a striker for 25 million and paid the 65 per week basic we normally do. Those 125 per week wages are always based on a truckload of bonus payments. And yes, I understand the lack of sell on value for a guy who’s about sixty.

Two years of Zlatan at 300 grand is £31,200,000. The man has already scored 17 goals this season. I’m thinking a lot of Zlatan shirts would have been under trees this year, too.

Two years of whomever at 65 grand per week, plus 25 million in fees, comes out to £31,760,000.

Ok. I’m done. On to the match.

The opening five minutes were perfect….for making a third cup of coffee. Bank holiday, fresh heavy cream from a local dairy farm, mmmmm. When I finished making my caffeinated elixir, Payet and Lanzini started to find a bit of space near the top of the Manchester United penalty area. The first two times the end products were weak, low shots that went out for goal kicks. But in the 10th minute, Feghouli started a counter that eventually found its way to Lanzini at the top of the box, and the nimble Argentine fired a hard shot that deGea didn’t have to touch, but he did and it resulted in a West Ham corner.

Much was said on TV over here early on about Feghouli’s lively and positive opening minutes. But in the 15th minute, Mike Dean undid all of that and created a ridiculous rest of the match when he sent the Algerian off for a hard challenge on Phil Jones. Yellow? Maybe. Red? Never. And to make it even more insulting, a minute later Lingard lunged in to challenge Kouyate and saw nothing.

Mike Dean should be ashamed of himself. But like all referees, they are not held accountable in any way for their errors. They are, in a football sense, above the law.

At that point, I figured I knew what kind of evening we were in for. Sit back, defend like hell, and hope we can steal a nil-nil draw. But that didn’t happen. We tried. In the face of injustice and daunting odds, we tried.

Antonio was taken from the center forward position and moved wide, while Lanzini occupied whatever the part of the middle of the pitch we could work with. I made the decision not to comment on every period of possession the visitors had because that would be pointless.

Random comment. Nordtveit continued to look reasonably comfortable and composed at right back.

In the 36th minute, Manchester United guaranteed a spot on the end of the season highlight film for Miss Of The Season. Zlatan sent a ball from the right side of the area to Mkhitaryan at the left post. Mkhitaryan squared the ball to Valencia in front of goal, with Randolph committed to his right. With the whole net open, a few feet away, Valencia directed the ball towards the net for a sure fire opening goal. But somehow, against everything we know about the capacity of the human body, Randolph got his left leg back to make a save. The ball bounced to Lingard, who had an equally open net in front of him, but his shot went off the post and right to Randolph.

Against the run of play, as well as the odds, West Ham came close to a goal of their own in the 44th minute when Antonio did well to pick out Lanzini near the top of the Manchester United eighteen yard box. After a short cut to his right he sent a curling effort on goal that deGea did quite well to palm wide for a corner. Then, in the final minute of added time, West Ham won a free kick to the left of the Manchester United penalty area. Payet swung his effort in, and despite West Ham protestations about a hand ball Mike Dean blew the whistle to end the first half.

Mike Dean and blow are words that seem appropriate in the same breath today.

Halftime
West Ham 0
Manchester United 0

Mourinho understandably started the second half with an attacking substitute, inserting Mata and removing Darmian. I was disappointed to see the once booked Darmian leave, along with the hope of a make-good sending off.

West Ham had a chance in the 53rd minute when Payet stood over a free kick on the right side of the visitors box. His delivery was good, and Antonio was the first to get to it but his header went wide.

In the 60th minute, West Ham broke on a counter with numbers. Lanzini got the ball in the center of the pitch and rolled a lovely through ball to Antonio, who timed his run perfectly. Antonio took his shot right away when he had time to make another touch or even two, and deGea was able to come out and make the save. Moments later, Rashford made a run down the left and forced any number of West Ham defenders to commit. He then calmly found Mata in the box, and the second half substitute broke the deadlock.

West Ham 0
Manchester United 1

Despite surrendering an almost inevitable goal, West Ham showed admirable spirit and energy. Carroll replaced Payet, and almost immediately did what a center forward does. Created a set piece chance by drawing a foul. Unfortunately the delivery was poor and Manchester United got the ball out their area.

In the 74th, it was Rashford on the left again. This time he found Pogba alone in the box, but the one hundred million pound man curled his right footed effort wide. A minute later, Valencia fouled Lanzini to give West Ham a free kick. Even a wine salesman knew that was what we needed to create a chance to level the affair. But for some reason, Ogbonna took the free kick short and West Ham didn’t even get the ball into the area.

In the 79th minute, the officiating continued their shameful display. Herrera had a shot from the top of the area blocked. For some reason, Obiang tried a stylish pass out of danger instead of putting his boot through it. The ball ricochet to Zlatan in an offside position, but the flag stayed down when the towering Swede rifled the ball past Randolph.

Final Score
West Ham 0
Manchester United 2

Most of us likely expected nothing from today, considering Manchester United had won five straight and were unbeaten in ten. The fact that Mike Dean ruined what had the look of a tasty affair, and then the linesman missed what was about as easy an offside call as he will ever have, should only be a negative on them. Not on West Ham.

Shame on you, Men In Black.

About us

West Ham Till I Die is a website and blog designed for supporters of West Ham United to discuss the club, its fortunes and prospects. It is operated and hosted by West Ham season ticket holder, LBC radio presenter and political commentator Iain Dale.

More info

Follow us

Contact us

Iain Dale, WHTID, PO Box 663, Tunbridge Wells, TN9 9RZ

Visit iaindale.com, Iain Dale’s personal website & blog.

Get in touch

Copyright © 2024 Iain Dale Limited.